As I’m leafing through previous postings to see what sort of filth I’m aloud to spew on here, I stumbled across an April posting by Seth Miller regarding 99x. I was never a diehard 99x fan (I still long for the singsong electronica voice that announced “Power ninety-nine!”), but his post got me to thinking. Does anyone remember Dr. Roger Libby?

The good doctor hosted The Pleasuredome, a sex call-in show in which it seemed like trailer dwellers from all over the metro area called in to ask his advice on everything from herpes to threesomes to herpetic threesomes. The best calls were when the enquirer spoke in a whispered voice to ask his question. The callers all claimed to be 18 or over but somehow I often pictured a fourteen-year-old hiding up in his bedroom with his hand over the mouthpiece of the phone trying to keep his parents from hearing him ask his probing question. I wonder how many such callers were relieved when Dr. Libby’s answer would be that, contrary to what they had heard at school, you wouldn’t really grow hair on your palms from repeated self-love behind closed doors.

Bisexuality seemed to be his answer to everything. Sure, I can see it if a guy called in and confessed to a fantasy of an ecstatic night with John Goodman and Roseanne Barr, but that caller got the same diagnosis as the one who asked about wanting to paint his girlfriend’s toenails. Dr. Libby had one of those nasally voices like Tom Shane or the guy from the Mattress Factory and I can still remember him saying time after time, “Well, you know he could be bisexual.” Come to think of it he was probably just trying to recruit switch hitters for his Petting Zoo Party. Remember those? According to the show he would provide little round stickers, some red and some green, to party-goers whose job it was to affix the red stickers on places they did not want to be touched and green stickers where they wanted to be touched. I seem to remember you got free cover if you came dressed as an animal, and Dr. Libby came dressed as a zookeeper. I never went to one; I’m just saying I heard about it on the radio.

As with any pressing issue of our modern day the solution can almost always be found on the inner-web. A quick search of Dr. Roger Libby’s website www.drrogerlibby.com reveals that he is alive and doing well in the city by the bay. While he does have a new book out, The Naked Truth about Sex: A Guide to Intelligent Sexual Choices for Teenagers and Twentysomethings (why do more and more books have such long-ass subtitles?) it doesn’t appear he’s had another call-in show since the Pleasuredome. Oh well, I guess now those aforementioned frustrated fourteen-year-olds and frotteurists will have to find their solution elsewhere.

I recently heard a rumor that many of them switched to blogging.