Her follow up thoughts were mostly in-town, upscale spots that have one or two extra bright spots of deliciousness.

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It’s hard to pick a place that says “ATLANTA”….
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If i wanted to do a good food tour…it would be progressive dinner…Cakes & Ale for Corina’s cocktails with some fried okra…
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..then on to Pura Vida for more small plates…esp. the mushroom celery leaf/hearts of palm salad, the goat mofongo, ceviche
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…then Aria for a filling app or two like the truffled potato thing and then one of Aria’s awesome desserts
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A keep it real tour would be: Ann’s or The Vortex for burgers, Northside Tavern for booze, Carver’s for hole in the wall yummy

My suggestion hands down would Mulligans, but it’s closed. *a moment of silence, please*

Where would you take Bourdain, or suggest that he go? Witticisms and predictible snappy one liners aside.

Seriously?

We were just musing this weekend what a PITA it is to escape Midtown Promenade (Midtown Landmark Cinema, Apres Diem, The Highlander) and how they should really put a short, steep cut through to WF/Home Depot in – you know – just an alternate escape route.

Because the universe heard me and hates me, it decided to help make things worse instead of better.

Traffic in that area will be an even bigger treat than it is today in 3…2…1…

Two years since I wrote.

TWO. YEARS.

Today at 10am the defendants will be entering guilty please in courtroom 4E.

Defendants Tremaine Lovelace and Lanorris Moore will be entering guilty pleas on Monday, August 17, 2009 at 10:00 in court room 4E before Judge Kimberly Esmond Adams.

These two defendants are charged with the August 25, 2007 home invasion and armed robbery at 992 Dekalb Avenue in Inman Park:

Six couples were sitting in the residence when they heard gunshots and realized that the residence was the target of gunfire. The couples then tried to escape by jumping from a second story balcony. Three of the people were seriously injured during the escape. Thirty to forty rounds of ammunition were found in the residence when the police arrived. The two men were apprehended immediately at the Inman Park Marta Station.

Please come and support our victims as they take this important step in seeking justice.

Sharla Jackson
Community Prosecutor
Zone 5

My proposal for punishment: maybe we let those six folks who were fired upon share thirty to forty rounds and fire back. I’m just sayin’: if we still lopped hands off for shoplifting…

I’ve sucked it up for weeks trying to meet this goal, excuses excuses. This week it’s because I was pissed AGAIN and I don’t want to be pegged as that angry girl. Even if I am an angry girl.

Pissed why, you ask?

You’re so thoughtful. Let me tell ya, it was a helluva Friday.

My morning meetings ran long but I was determined to make a stop to see a friend in need of a hug, so I bolted out of my office downtown and made a beeline for my hood – O4W at Inman Park.

I popped in to see him at his place on Irwin St. and parked under a big pretty fluffy tree who promised me with the sign language of leaves that if it started raining again it would protect me.

What it didn’t mention was that it had no intention of protecting me from ashole thieves jumping out of bushes.

The 10 minute visit really was, and as I came back out to the truck to find her rain-free, I opened my door and shit was strewn. Everywhere.

Because 10 minutes is all an opportunistic thief needs to cut your window (even if the doors are unlocked) and take two bags of items that are only valuable to you out of your life forever. Bags you can’t even inventory for the police 20 minutes later because you never think of their contents. Books. Notebooks. Electronics for recycling. A frizbee.

This is nothing really, compared to what Paulie went through the day before – it was just my vehicle that had been voilated – not my home. Still…hurt, pissed, adrenaline flowing like the Nile.

I’m pissed because it’s my neighborhood, because I got comfortable in the middle of the day and wasn’t paying attention to what was going on around me. I’m pissed because the door was unlocked and they cut the top anyway. I’m pissed because that was upwards of $300 of my hard earned dollars that went out the window (HA! See what I did there?) instead of to an upcoming and much earned vacation I’ve budgeted for (you asshole) I’m pissed because I know better than to leave anything in my truck. I’m pissed because the jerk was lurking at a MARTA stop and left a footprint on my bumper proving he was acting like he “owned” it (yeah, baby, CSI on the scene right here).

So here’s where my rant ends and the 411 begins – listen up.

The responding officer enlightened me on two counts:

1) The #POCATL (perception of crime in Atlanta, TM http://twitter.com/andishehnouraee) may be a non-issue. ? The problem according to my officer isn’t getting the guys off the streets, it’s keeping them in our overfilled jails on “petty theft”. What do we do? I don’t know. Someone tell me whose door to bang on, phone to call, email inbox to assault.

2) He’s waiting for the vigilantism to kick in. Apparently the incident at Graveyard last spring wasn’t enough – he’s waiting for Atlantants to get PISSED and start fighting back. I’m ready. Who likes the sound of a shotgun?

3) It’s not the kids, apparently they tend to strike at night when all the older thieves are worn out from their brazen assholeness. Daytime crime is about the grownups who would rather take your stuff than work for their own.

4) There was/is a thief hanging near the *bucks at 7th and P’Tree with the same MO: he knew how long it took to make a latte and since there’s no line of sight between the parking lot and the shop, he’d smash and grab. Keep your heads up and your eyes open.

4) I wanted to give Inman Park Patrol a heads up – didn’t’ expect them to respond just to BOLO – but couldn’t…because I’m not paying. WTF? There was an email address on the website to apply to pay…thanks for nuttin’.

Enlightening, disheartening, disappointing, annoying. My heart is broken for this…for a million reasons. I just haven’t found it in me to let go of my anger yet.

I hope you don’t go through anything like it anytime soon.

The Man Friend/Partner for Life/Love Monkey and I just finished a 994mile (one way) jaunt to the wiles of Omaha, Nebraska for reasons I won’t bore you with. What’s relevant here is that in order to get from A-Town to O-Town in his adorable, shiny, nimble Mini, we had to pass through the following states: Tennessee, Kentucky, Illinois, Missouri and lastly – Nebraska.

First, I’ll point out that we have more potty stops than any other state. This rules. This especially rules when you’re finally starting to consume your RDA of H2O. Yeah. Hello, gerbil bladder! I didn’t know you were coming with us!

Second, I’ll say (and my body can corroborate what my mind is churning out) that our highways are smoooooooove compared to other states. Especially St. Louis, MO where we thought we’d hit a musk ox but it turned out to be a gap between cement segments. Our smoooooveness rules when you’re in a tiny car with tight suspension, have bewbs and didn’t wear a jog bra for the trip.

Lastly, I’ll point out that we have better signage and indicators that there’s a COFFEE SHOP, BY GOD I’M ON A ROAD TRIP HERE, PEOPLE.

So that’s it. We pretty much rule. Our highways are superior. Get out there, let your butt feel for itself.

That shouldn’t stop you though – especially when it’s free! This year’s Zoo Atlanta “Open House” is scheduled for Saturday August 8th and Sunday August 9, from 9:30 am-5:30 pm. Admission is free for residents of the City of Atlanta and Fulton County.

Any of the following forms of identification will permit one adult and up to three children to enjoy free entry on those days: GA driver’s license with City/County address; GA voter ID or GA ID; utility bill with City/County address.

When they selected a bright, large apartment near the Krispy Kreme on Ponce, their friends gave them the thumbs up.

Thanks for that, a-holes.

OTOH, my sister lives in Austin and has a friend coming to our fair city in August to scope it out. Said friend is hoping to move here, and I plan to drive her around the in-town neighborhoods, warn her about Stone Mountain (prepare to be underwhelmed), help her find a temple and figure out what really makes her tick to see if I can help plug her in.

My point? A question: what do you wish someone had told you before you moved to Atlanta, or what did you find out the hard way? I wish someone had warned me that “downtown” wasn’t a real “downtown” back in 1994, and had taken more time to ensure that I fully understood blue laws.

The patrols and the need have evolved – or devolved, as it were. Due to demand, there’s now the West End patrol, EAV patrol, the happily named Trolly Patrol, the Druid Hills patrol and others.

It’s got me both riled and inspired.

On the one hand, it makes me happy to see citizens being creative and constructive. While I myself have been the victim of random and tiny disruptive burglaries and have been tempted to go all kinds of vigilante, this peaceful way of dealing with crime soothes the cockles of my hippy drippy side.

On the other hand (the one I wipe with), it chaps my baby smooth bum to know that we’re having to subsidize our own safety due to the mismanagement of city funds, the furloughing of officers, and the general incompetence of one short haired, short startured city official. Blegh. Disgusting.

All that navel gazing aside, I offer you the following resources, prices and snippets. They should be used of course in conjunction with the still new (and kicking azz and taking names) citizens organization: ATAC (Atlantans Together Against Crime). If we aren’t making ourselves heard, seen and smelled, then we’re happily lapping up the fate that’s being dished out at us in big stinky piles.

Inman Park’s patrol has three levels of buy-in ranging from $200-300

NOTE: The main distinguishing aspect of Bronze, Silver, and Gold level membership is access to the patrol officer.

The West End Historic District Patrol

Costs: for residents: $25 monthly or $70 quarterly, for businesses: $40 monthly or $115 quarterly. There is also a $10 – one-time fee for new members.

Druid Hills Patrol dues “are based on one of three payment schedule choices: Annually $480 due in January; Bi-Annually $250 due in January & July; Quarterly $130 due in January, April, July, & October.”

The Trolley Patrol is “Atlanta’s newest private neighborhood security patrol. Serving the neighborhoods of Southeast Atlanta, the Trolley Patrol is open to the residents of Benteen Park, Boulevard Heights, McDonough-Guice, North Ormewood Park, Ormewood Park and Woodland Hills. Membership dues are $90/quarter or $330/yr.”

East Atlanta Security Patrol
“The geographic membership area of EACA shall have a west border of Moreland Avenue, north to I-20. The northern border shall be I-20 to Flat Shoals Road, where the border will go east of I-20 to include that portion of the City of Atlanta east of I-20. From there, the eastern border will be Fayetteville Road to Eastland Road and its intersection with Moreland Avenue.”

“Yes, we already pay taxes and expect police protection, but other neighborhoods like Grant Park have seen reductions in residential crimes of over 50% since starting a similar patrol.”

The options are one year of service for $200, six months for $100 or three months for $50. There is an initial fee of $15 which is added to your first payment to cover operating expenses.

Only loosely related: this morning I caught a frat boy in a baseball hat, khaki’s and a polo peeing on the abandoned building behind mine. I assume he assumed he assumed no one would see him through the privacy fence. Thanks for that, parents of Gen Y’ers.

Please to enjoy and please to add any I missed.

Henderson was shot and fatally injured January 7th while closing up at The Standard in Grant Park.

There will be a press conference at 2p, and ATAC will be tweeting live, if you want to follow the news as it develops. Additional information is being posted as it comes in on the ATAC blog.

The arrest was that of Johnathan Redding, a 17 year old.

I’ll give you this: it’s not green, and it’s certainly not good for tiny – and not so tiny -pedestrians wandering around downtown Atlanta with no clue where they’re going who are obliviously huffing the invisible clouds of emissions into their otherwise pink lungs. While I have my own opinions about how this applies to a trucker trying to get a good nights rest in 30 or 90 degree temperatures, that’s not the point of my post.

My point is this: the dozens of buses that line up along Centennial Olympic Park in various shapes, sizes, colors and with a veritable cornucopia of passive-agressive propaganda and marketing dripping from their sides: sitting there for hours on end, oozing emissions while their inhabitants frolic in the spray of the dancing rings or ambush the CNN Center food court or are pressing their dirty little hands up against the glass of the whale tank at the aquarium.

There’s an exemption for weather as well as for passenger loading and unloading, and I ask you: at what point does Atlanta not have “weather”?

With all of the Segway-riffic ambassadors, suck-it-up machine drivers, lawn watering monitors and are we left without funds in the coffers for enforcement officers visit these drivers and enforce the law?

Once again I’m scratching my wee noggin and asking: what’s the point of establishing a law if you (seemingly) have no means or plans to enforce them?

I’m tempted to ask if this is just me being old and crotchety, but I’m fairly certain I already know the answer.