I went to the Thrashers game last night with an old friend. We were supposed to meet and ride down together, but he was running late leaving work, so we agreed to meet at the CNN Center. At first, this seemed pretty reasonable to me; I would drive to Inman Park and then take Marta down to the Georgia Dome station. I had done it plenty of times before, but I had never done it when I knew I would be coming home after dark, by myself. I realized when I was getting ready to leave my car and walk into the station that i was not as comfortable with the thought of returning at 10 pm that night as I thought I was. Turns out I was kind of scared.

This really struck me like a ton of bricks. I consider myself an independent modern woman. I go places by myself and in fact like to be on my own around town. I like to eat alone, I play trivia on Tuesdays and park and go by myself. I like to go to movies by myself. But last night, I realized i was scared and nervous to get back on Marta after the game and come home by myself. Even worse, I knew it wasn’t a baseless or irrational fear. If anything, it was smart.

You see, the night before, neighbors had been mugged at gunpoint, in the middle of a busy street, with joggers and dog walkers and diners out and about, not a tenth of a mile from where I had parked about 20 minutes before. To top that off, a friend of mine in Grant Park came home that very same day to find cops surrounding her house after an attempted break-in. That’s two acquaintances within a couple of miles each other who were the victims of crime or attempted crime on the same day. If two people I know experience crime on the same day, how many hundreds of people in Atlanta are affected by crime day in and day out?

I know people are probably sick of my posts about Atlanta’s crime, but I am downright preoccupied with it recently. I no longer go running by myself in my own neighborhood. I used to, but now it just seems risky to me. A year ago, I wouldn’t have thought twice about taking Marta by myself. Last night, I took Marta down to Phillips, but when it came time to head back, I opted instead for having my friend drop me off at my car.

And you know what? It really sucks being scared and feeling limited in my actions, and feeling helpless to protect myself against the wastes of oxygen who are out there preying on Atlanta. It really pisses me off.